


Drive away the shadows

by SakuraAlexia



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:47:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26979826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SakuraAlexia/pseuds/SakuraAlexia
Summary: Nightmares.They were a common occurrence in all people, especially in a world full of dangers and death at every corner like Pandora. They were unconscious fears that showed up uninvited in the middle of the night.Some fears were stupid and irrational, others, were sparked from previous memories and traumas that had really happened in the past.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Drive away the shadows

Nightmares. 

They were a common occurrence in all people, especially in a world full of dangers and death at every corner like Pandora. They were unconscious fears that showed up uninvited in the middle of the night.

Some fears were stupid and irrational, others, were sparked from previous memories and traumas that had really happened in the past.

Maya had a lot of the second kind through her life, and she could recall all of them as clear as day. A terrible ability she was positive was enhanced from her status of Siren, or maybe it was simply the kind of training she had received, made to hone her mind, so it would be it as sharp as possible.

These dreams were a pretty common occurrence when she was young. Athenas was supposed to be a safe heaven, but it had never been for her, not when you were being used by people with no regard for anything but themselves and their own selfish gains. It didn’t matter if someone like her, who couldn’t help having being born the way she did, was going to suffer through her entire life because of them and their goals.

The situation had gotten worse, for a while, right after she had abruptly left her home planet and arrived to Pandora. She supposed it was the whole anxiety that it came with being on the planet in the first place, but also the people and all the creatures that lived on it. Everything was out to try and kill her, and it wasn’t something she had ever been used nor trained for back home. Athenas was safe, Pandora, was the polar opposite, and that, was an understatement.

She hadn’t known how to properly relate with other people either, which had only added problems. She had no idea what even talking to strangers even meant, since she had spent twenty seven long years confined in an abbey, with nothing else but the company of the monks that raised her, and books.

It had been hard to sleep, between the plaguing nightmares from the life she had abandoned just a short while before, driven by guilt for having abandoned the citizens of Athenas, that, despite everything, still had believed in her and were just as innocent. She knew, and she had been completely selfish.

And, the fear of having to face this whole new world where everything was out to get to her, and she had to be on alert all the time, otherwise, she would have ended up with a bullet to the head within the next few minutes. She was sure Brother Sophis would have loved to see her that way after what she did to him. It would have been ironic.

She had endured it, and came to know new people, that soon became her first friends she ever had. And, as time passed in their company, she found out that she hadn’t been the only one whose mind was tormented.

Gaige had been the most obvious, because, despite the cheerful aura and the inclination for violence she showed on the battlefield, it was easy to see that she was still very much too young for this world. Unlike the rest of them.

The girl missed her father dearly, and even if Axton had with time become somewhat a replacement, a substitute father figure, he could have never replaced her real one. He knew it, and he never tried to take his place, he had done his best to aid her with this lack of someone to rely on. Maya herself had helped, unconsciously becoming a somewhat mother/older sister to the girl. It had been pure instinct, it wasn’t as evident as Axton, but she cared for Gaige as much as him, and so, did the rest too.

The commando only ended up having a bigger impact between them all. They supposed it was because she was used at living with just a father, and he had looked like the closest thing to it.

Speaking of the soldier, he didn’t make it a secret that his old days in the military still weighed him down, and sometimes he dreamed of the people that had died in the process so he could become a glory hound, guilting him, and rightfully so.

He had made a promise, upon knowing the rest of them, to change and become a better and caring person. Certainly, mostly because of Gaige, he was making progresses. Though he did have a soft spot for them all, being friends and helping each other out was what they tried to do best.

Because on Pandora it was all they had.

This planet takes away everything from everyone, those were the words of Salvador, the one of them that had been born and had lived here his entire life. He explained how slowly he had lost everything, but most of all his dignity, because this place forced you to do anything, even the most deplorable actions in order to survive.

But one thing he didn’t lose was his affection for his family, being his grandmother back in his home village, or be his group of friends, it didn’t matter, they had his support. He had told them how he had been bullied as a kid, and how it still nags at him sometime, which is why he did what he could for the people that didn’t judge him. He owed them.

Because they did not hold judgement on others, they were all different in their own unique ways, but all good people, even who unfortunately didn’t look like one anymore, and it wasn’t his fault. That one being Krieg.

The poor man wasn’t able to express himself to them well enough, but his actions spoke louder than the words that came out of his mouth. Starting on how he had saved Maya in the first place, which is what made them trust him enough for him to tag along. And they were glad they kept him around.

Big guy was not only an extremely reliable ally in battle, with his seemingly never ending bloodlust, but he was also good at listening to other people, whenever they spoke of their problems. And even had words of encouragement for them too, always cryptic as the language of a psycho was, but in time they learned to understand his words better.

Maya had always been best at it though. She hadn’t told them she could hear his inner voice, didn’t even know why or how she could, she assumed it was an extension of her powers. However the inner voice wanted to keep it a secret, so she did. She knew it was because of his fear of being judged from other people, so he did her best to ease his mind about it. Even though she knew the others wouldn’t judge him at all, she wasn’t willing to break her word.

Along with his fears of being seen as a monster and nothing else, came the memories of when he had been experimented on. They had found out in a horrible way, through messages Hyperion most likely willingly left behind in order to scare the patients or whoever came across them.

It had been a day where everyone felt absolutely terrible, they felt bad for Krieg, he was their friend and he didn’t deserve what had been done to him, but also, they had been utterly mad at Jack and his stupid corporation.

It hadn’t been much after they had withnessed the murder of Bloodwing too, which didn’t make things easier, though their anger did aid them in thrashing the facility entirely. That, had been satisfying, for the time being.

Mordecai, if he didn’t have nightmares before, certainly he began having them after that event, fortunately he had his friends to help him through it.

One thing Brick had been afraid of, was to lose friends, as dumb as the man appeared to be, he was extremely loyal to them, and that was a fact. His fears had come true once Roland died, and Lilith had been taken, However he had been strong enough to use them as a driving force to help in getting the Siren back.

The fear of losing Lilith had been real, but fortunately it never became true. However the woman hadn’t come back unscathed. Whatever Jack touched was either destined to die or to be scarred for life. The man had killed the person she had loved right in front of her and tortured her physically and mentally for days, and the effect lasted long, as she refused to even sleep, for the nightmares she was having, until her body gave in to exhaustion eventually. 

It had been a truly tough time.

They didn’t know if Zer0 even dreamed or slept, he never expressed anything about it, but it was clear he shared the same worries as all of them, as he wasn’t willing to lose his friends.

Overall, all of them had their fears, some more explicit, others, much less, but they were willing to share the burden with one another. All of them except one. Maya herself.

With the passing of time, she had learned to care about others, and that others cared about her, something that had been foreign to her. But it had been for that reason that she wanted to keep them away from her previous life.

Part of her didn’t want them to worry, as her past was something she wanted to bury away as deep as possible, and the other part of her was afraid it would have been just like Athenas. She didn’t want them to worship her or anything, all she wanted was to be their equal, as she had always been.

And if they were to ever find out she was supposed to be the ruler, the queen of an entire planet who knows how they would have reacted. She didn’t want to find out.

Memories of countless people around her, praising, praying and begging for her to help them, extending their hands towards her, as if touching her would grant them a blessing as she walked by on the streets of Athenas, as the monks paraded her around like the goddess that was supposed to save the world, dressed in her best and most formal attire, with heavy jewels and long hair braided accurately to fit the image, flooded her mind.

She could still feel the touch of those strangers all over her.

The feeling lingered long even after she woke up from that memory, drenched in sweat and shaking, her left arm often bleeding from herself clawing at it. It hurt, it always did, but she couldn’t care less. She loved her powers, they had always been part of her, but they were a curse that had ruined her life the moment she was born.

If only she could remove them somehow… but no matter how much she could hurt her arm, she could scratch it, cut it, burn it, and anything else, but those markings would always be there no matter what. Still that cyan blue she had always known, lying on top of the abused skin, never changing, never moving, as if they were meant to hide the pain she felt inside and not.

Still all wrapped up in the memories, she didn’t notice anyone come into her room until she felt that hand on her arm.

“Get away from me!” she yelled.

Her breath quickened as she showed the person away, curling herself in a corner as further away from that person as she could, until her back hit the wall. Her right hand still gripping tightly the left one, as crimson red streaks stained it.

Through her panicking heart and her blurred vision she couldn’t make up who it was, nor she cared, all she wanted was for this person to go away and leave her be. She didn’t want them, she didn’t want any more hands on her, no more…

  
  


Axton looked to the rest of them that were standing in the doorway, looking for help. Normally none of them would invade Maya’s privacy, however, they were very well aware of the Siren’s troubles at night, however, since she never said anything, they had decided to let her be. And they did for far too long.

Lately her fits had become more frequent and more violent, and they were done in letting her suffer in silence. She always had something for them whenever there was a problem, of any kind, and what kind of friends would they be if they just let her hurt herself instead?

She didn’t know she screamed whenever she had these dreams, and they never pressed the issue, if it wasn’t for it probably they wouldn’t have noticed her problems, but they did, and they had to help her out through it.

Maya had always been quiet and reserved about herself, but they had hoped she’d reach out to them if she needed to. No such thing ever happened, and they decided that enough was enough.

However the thing seemed harder to pull off than what it should have been. They didn’t expect the Siren to panic so much and try to hide away in fear, so it wasn’t easy to get to her without scaring her, and with that, they also feared her powers reacting to her emotions.

Axton was about to try again, but another tattooed arm stopped him.

“Let me.”

Lilith stepped through, and slowly approached the cowering Siren, as her grey eyes glared and her clenched teeth sneered at her.

“Don’t touch me.” she growled at her.

The Firehawk didn’t do such thing, she just crouched beside her, her golden eyes holding the other woman’s gaze.

“I won’t.” she softly replied, showing Maya her hands and then hiding them behind her back. “I won’t touch you, I won’t hurt you.” she spoke again.

It seemed to do the trick as Maya’s breath slowed a little, no longer as panicked as it was before.

“That’s it, just breathe Maya.” she did the same thing, sucking in air then releasing it slowly. “Just like this.”

They did this for a little longer, until Maya’s breath evened out and she was calm again. She blinked at them, her eyes then resting on Lilith, as the woman smiled, sweet and understanding.

“Lilith…” she whispered.

But the woman wasn’t listening, as one of her hands came closer to Maya’s, where her right hand was still clawing at her left arm. It brushed it, but didn’t linger, asking for permission. Maya nodded and her and Lilith’s hand, steady but gentle, untangled those fingers from where they were, so she wouldn’t hurt herself any longer.

“Well… it's over now, you can all leave.” Maya addressed them, her voice wavering despite herself.

“Nonsense, we’re not leaving you alone again.” Axton shook his head.

“It was just a nightmare.” 

“It’s more than that if you always have them, it’s a problem, for you and for us.” he replied, refusing to let go of the topic.

“It’s none of your business!” she yelled back at him.

“Stop being stubborn, Maya!” he screamed back at her. This wasn’t going to turn up good.

“SHUT UP!” Krieg’s booming voice did stop them from fighting. “WE CAME TO DRIVE AWAY THE SHADOWS PLAGUING THE MIND!”

“Krieg’s right, we’re here to help, Maya.” Gaige spoke up from behind the hulking man.

“And you’re not going to leave me be, right?” the Siren asked, sighing heavily as all she got were affirmative nods.

“How long have you known about this?”

“Since always /we kept silent/ hoping you’d reach out.” Zer0 answered her. “But you never did. Why?” it was Axton that asked, now having calmed down.

Maya sighed again, raking a hand through her hair, staining them red in the process, much to her dismay. “I guess I thought it shouldn’t have been something you should have worried about.”

“You worried us more this way, you know that right?” Lilith said, fully knowing it was a useless thing to say, as she got a nod as she thought she would.

“You don’t have to tell us what the whole thing is about, but we don’t want you to hurt yourself anymore.” she gestured at her arm. 

“I know… but I am not too sure how you could help me…” she looked down, her feet suddenly becoming interesting. “I never… I never had anyone aiding me. With this, but with anything else too, I don’t know where to begin in asking for help even…”

“Well, if this isn’t a plea, I don’t know what else it could be.” Axton shrugged.

“Hey, let’s all stay here for the night, just like you stay with us when we are having troubles.” Gaige grinned. Besides, it was only fair.

“I don’t think…” Maya was however cut off by Krieg again.

“PILLOW PARTY!” he yelled, laughing.

“Heck yeah! Krieg you have the best ideas!” the mechromancer then addressed the others. “Let’s go get tons of pillows and blankets, we’ll need to fill the room with them.”

Her excitement was met with an equal amount of it from the rest too, especially from the psycho, but also from the other men too, as they all left the room with her.

“I don’t think this is necessary…” Maya sighed, but her words fell to deaf ears, as everyone but Lilith left them.

“It’ll be okay, trust me.”

Just as promised, the others came back with a mountain of colorful blankets and pillows, Krieg, Salvador, Brick and Axton carrying the big load, as Mordecai and Gaige came in with a handful of snacks, because, as the girl put it, you never knew when you’d need them. Zer0 instead went to get medical supplies, not intending to let her bleed all over the place.

The other guys got comfy in Maya’s room, despite her useless protests, throwing the things they brought with them all over the place and on themselves, as Lilith, Gaige and Krieg claimed their places near Maya's bed, and not wanting to move from there at all.

“So Lilith… how did you know what to do when I was well… panicking?” Maya’s voice interrupted the cheerful atmosphere, As Zer0 diligently worked on her arm, carefully fixing and bandaging it.

The other woman sat on her bed. “I used to be like that, I know that feeling well, that if you didn’t have these tattoos, if you weren’t different, then things would be good. You wished you never had them, and wanted to tear them out from your skin, but no matter what they stayed there as if they were mocking you.”

“That’s… a pretty accurate way to put it.”

“I used to feel this way all the time when I was younger, and other kids bullied me back in school. It was an awful feeling, but my parents helped me through it, and eventually I accepted what I was.” she explained.

“If only I was that lucky…” Maya sighed.

“You weren’t, but you have us now.” Axton said. “You don’t have to say anything even, just ask us to help you and we’ll do what we can.”

“AND DRIVE THE SHADOWS AWAY”

“As Krieg said.” Gaige friendly elbowed him.

Maya looked at them all for a moment, a smile taking place on her face, maybe she could trust them with the truth then…

“Then maybe I should tell you what bothers me so much.” she said, not really thinking, as the words came out on their own.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, we’re all ears for whenever you’re ready.” Lilith put a hand on Maya’s leg, then quickly took it back. “Sorry.” she shot her an apologetic look.

“It’s fine now. I just…” Maya took a breath, mentally preparing herself for what she was about to reveal. “I was a queen once…”

“Of Athenas, right?” Axton asked and she nodded, then frowned, shocked. “Wait… you knew? But how?”

“We found some old recordings in the preserve.” he replied simply.

“We found out about you and what happened, we know you have been used by those monks, and it pisses me off.” Gaige crossed her arms.

“You never thought that I should have known about this?”

“You never speak of your past, chica.” Salvador replied to her, having been silent until now.

“We thought, since you refused to say anything of your previous life, that it would bother you if we talked about this, that your past made you suffer so you never talked about it. We didn’t wish to hurt you with it.” the soldier explained.

“But then the nightmares came.” Maya sighed, stupid things gave her away.

A moment of silence passed.

“Sometimes I would be allowed outside of the abbey, to be taken for a stroll and paraded around like a clown from the Order. The people of Athenas, as innocent as they were, tricked by the monks, believed I was some sort of Goddess that would save them, so, as I passed by, they would reach out to me, touch me anywhere they could reach… I can still feel all those hands all over me in my dreams…”

“That’s horrible, Maya…” Lilith’s eyes softened.

“Well, I can’t imagine that kind of touch being pleasant… Hey!” Axton’s words were cut off by a pillow smacking in his face. “Stop being a pervert, Ax.” Gaige glared at him.

Maya however giggled at the display, however it didn’t last long.

“It wasn’t all of it though.” she said, motiong at the other Siren. “Lilith spoke of bullying before yes? Well, I received another kind of it.”

While she was at it, she might as well go through with everything, no more secrets, she thought to herself as she turned her back to them, then grabbed her shirt and took it off, so they could see the extent of the cruelty of the Order.

A sickening pattern of white scars painted her back. There were a lot, small and old, long healed from when they were inflicted, but it didn’t mean they hurt any less whenever she thought about them.

When she pulled her shirt back on and turned again, she was met with various degrees of shock and rage. so, she spoke before anyone could say a thing.

“This was Brother Sophis’ doing. I wasn’t a good enough kid for him, too weak and too disobedient, so, he punished me for it, disguising it as training. Eventually, he stopped doing so when I grew up, and learned to defend myself, but mostly, as I became older and wiser, he was afraid I’d turn on him if I found out what the truth was behind these. It didn’t mean I feared him any less.” 

“MONSTER!” Krieg yelled and she nodded.

“Yes Krieg, he was a monster.” she sighed. “He’s dead now, but my body will forever bear these marks, so I may never be able to get rid of him.”

“But you don’t have to bear this weight alone anymore.” Lilith reached over to her, pulling her into a hug. Gaige also did, awkwardly wrapping her arms around Maya’s waist.

“NOTHING WILL HURT YOU AGAIN.” Krieg spoke, still somewhat yelling, but there was a much softer tone in his voice this time.

The others also scooted closer, wanting Maya to feel their presence.

And, with her first very friends all around her, feeling safe and loved for the first time ever, Maya let herself go, as tears of sorrow freely flowed from her eyes. Finally letting go and liberating herself from this heavy burden on her shoulders.

They stayed that way for as long as she had needed to. Until Axton said something stupidly flirty and everything escalated to a full pillow fight to the death and laughs, until they were all too tired to continue, and they all slept through the night piled on each other.

That night, Maya’s mind was no longer plagued from horrible memories again.


End file.
